Charter Schools for Inner City Boys

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The time has come for a major revolution in our inner-city schools. Through an exciting Charter School Management Operations who offer Charter Schools for the Engagement of Boys, we can now arm a grassroots militia of young soldiers with an education that can enable them to lift their communities out of poverty and crime. Charter schools, along with the National Academy of Sciences and others, believe that the alarming situation we have now is closely linked to dysfunctional educational systems and circumstances where fathers are absent or are not productive members of society.

Charter school for boys intends to change this by introducing specialized elementary schools across the country that educate and inspire young males with passion, self-esteem and life skills that can help them to topple obstructions linked to the intersection of poverty, crime and racism. They believe that nurturing, male-oriented learning environments, rather than intimidation and boiler plated lessons, are what it takes to smash the iconography of violence and poverty permeating these neighborhoods. This innovative approach can heal structural hopelessness and lead alumni to choose productive careers and positive social structures.

With the right support and preparation, they can become police officers, firefighters, businessmen, and civic leaders, able to climb the societal ladder long dominated by a mostly white patriarchy. By boys with pride and inspiration, they can drink from the well of prosperity. Policing for profit and other acts of social oppression won’t be eliminated overnight, of course, but history has shown that education is the powerful catalyst for positive change. Over time, the long history of systemic political and public school failures can be transformed into a new and exciting future.

Policymaking and Public Schools have Neglected Inner City Boys

The introduction of new educational systems is long overdue. Self-interested politics and a policy of institutional neglect have failed our children and damaged our inner cities, as evidenced by 40 years of rising poverty, decay and lawlessness. Even where there is little disagreement about what needs to be done, such as ensuring public safety, failures are rife. These include “accidental” shootings of individuals who are merely suspected of doing something wrong.

And yet, while urban police departments are in desperate need of guidance and solutions, they are not getting them, largely because local, state and federal governments are dysfunctional or under the control of those with troubling agendas. When the presidential election cycle is in full swing, town halls resonate with upbeat calls from the political elite–“We should help lift people out of poverty and give them freedom. Vote for me.” Afterwards, little changes. Political platitudes disappear as male dropouts are exploited by bad elements and they end up embracing the dark side of the dug slinging streets.

The fallout from unresponsive governments is compounded by an increasingly sclerotic educational school system. According to Christina Hoff Sommers, Factual Feminist and author of the War Against Boys, public schools often fail at turning inner-city boys into achievers because the curriculum is rigid, inflexible and genericized, or is whitewashed and totally at odds with their needs. Teachers hide behind a one-size-fits-all template that spurs many students, mostly boys, to disengage and fall behind. Over time, a notable percentage skips school or drops out completely, enticed by criminal behavior and a brutally alluring comradery on the streets.

Unfortunately, when that happens, a community’s most valuable resource becomes its worst enemy. Increasingly, neighborhoods are being hijacked by a worrying increase in crime-laden streets and the pervasiveness of the incarceration culture. Sadly, it is young males of color who have been at the forefront of this implosion; according to the FBI, black juveniles comprise 53.3 percent of all arrests. With few exceptions, the vicious cycle has fed on itself, as the offspring of the abandoned become abandoned themselves.

But that doesn’t mean there is no hope. By introducing a new structure and reconfigured teaching approach, experts and scholars have created an institution that can destroy the school-to-prison pipeline and, in turn, reinvigorate a system that has let so many people down. By inculcating the “science of the male” into all areas of the curriculum and classroom experience, reversing the traditional narrative, boys can experience the achievement, self-respect and educational outcomes that allow them to thrive. They become a driving force of reform, imbuing mothers, fathers and other family members with genuine pride.

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The Charter School Solution

All Charter School for the Engagement of Boys represents a real world solution that incorporates methods and a mission designed to connect with and encourage young males. Like backyard saplings transformed into great oaks, the boys in this program can grow tall, their arms extended like leaf-filled branches, offering an umbrella of hope and protection for others.

Charter schools have an impressive 20-year track record preparing students in educationally underserved communities for success in college. Liberated from boilerplate orthodoxies and red-tape regulations, they have been able to create flexible learning environments overseen, under the auspices of churches and other community organizations who understand the needs of those being served. Unlike detached bureaucrats who impose authority from afar, charter school “elders” can adjust to the realities on the ground and ensure that methods and goals are appropriate for students and the communities they live in.

The Science of the Male

One reason why proponents are so optimistic about the boys initiative is because it originates from the pioneering “The Science of the Male” as an approach based on years of rigorous and groundbreaking research on the state of males around the world. Among other things, their curriculum tackles critical issues head-on, with a syllabus that addresses traditional male learning difficulties within a well-defined learner-learning pedagogy.

More specifically, they have combined standard elementary school classwork with boy-specific tools to mold a firm but flexible framework aligned to the highest standards at age-appropriate stages. The learning environment they have developed integrates science of the male concepts into all major areas of study, as follows:

  • Embrace mathematical modeling of various brain aspects using interactions and assumptions that encourage the classic recognition principal, enabling assimilation of STEM concepts early on.
  • Employ techniques that manage the naturally hyperactive and restless nature of young males through processes and physical activities that are oriented toward discovering physical boundaries.
  • Integrate training efforts that address underlying issues of aggression and anger, helping to reduce, eliminate, and terminate conflicts and improve interpersonal and conflict management skills.
  • Emphasize structuring, setting and respecting boundaries.
  • Focus on teaching and improving reading, writing and math skills, including family arithmetic (e.g., the costs of running a home and birthing and raising children).
  • Incorporate personal management programs that promote self-respect and alter the core beliefs of insecurity, helping to dissolve negative emotional responses such as anger and jealousy.
  • Develop and encourage participation in regularly scheduled male empowerment events (e.g., “spend a day with a male role model”).
  • Adapt and embrace masculine characteristics such as integrity, courage, creativity, innovation, adaptability and compassion.

Incorporating these and other measures into a male-centric educational regime will serve as the impetus for stimulating and engaging young boys in hopeful learning, helping them discover true self- esteem and become productive members of society. By reorienting their natural masculinity with a laser-like focus towards virtuous outcomes, the charter schools for boys can prevent these children from falling victim to societal neglect or slipping through the cracks of an inadequate educational system.

How to Get Involved in the Revolutio

As with all organizations that seek positive change, a charter school needs operational and funding partners. Each charter school will require a community partner such as a church that employs an organizer–a self-starter with the time, skills and energy to communicate, reach out, email and phone others. As key local coordinators, these individuals will help breathe life into and provide CPR for damaged neighborhoods.

To support this long overdue change in the current narrative and help empower young males in their lives and communities, consider joining with the companies, institutions, donors, alumni and ordinary individuals around the country who are already doing their part. Partner with a charter school organization as a donor or sponsor, or lend a hand in some other way.

The time to act is now.

About the Author

Tim Patten has published the handy investment guide: MGTOW, Building Wealth and Power. He also wrote WHY I CHEAT11 campfire stories for men’s ears only. Both books are a celebration of masculinity and pay homage to the modern men’s liberation movement. Patten previously published a novel about establishing gender equality in professional sports, Roller Babes: 1950s Women of Roller Derby.

 

 

End Violence Against Women

Charter Schools a step forward in Ending Violence Against Women

According to the World Health Organization (WHO), roughly one in three women worldwide have experienced either physical and/or sexual intimate partner or non-partner sexual violence in their lifetimes. In the U.S., this costs society more than $5.8 billion a year, with $4.1 billion of that total being spent on direct medical and mental health services.

Needless to say, efforts have been underway to change this, including stepped-up funding for organizations, programs and directives oriented toward ending violence against women. Unfortunately, most have come up short. Instead of reducing the numbers of such incidents or the economic and other damage they cause, the various initiatives have largely served to promote the interests of those organizations that have fostered the dangerous illusion that significant progress is being made.

Thankfully, one group of scholars, including  Dr. Edward Stephens, Marianne J Legato, MD, Ona Robinson Phd, Richard Elfebien and others, have been working on this. Over the past three years, they have been developing and gaining support for an approach designed to attack the problem at its roots. They have sought to address the needs of males in kindergarten through sixth grade and reduce the attractiveness of and pressure to acquire a “street education,” where boys sling drugs and commit crimes of passion without regard for the victims–or themselves.

Anecdotal and other evidence suggests that many violent crimes are carried out by once innocent boys who were essentially abandoned by the system, leading them to fall behind and eventually, drop out of school and divorce themselves from parental authority. Experts have warned about the fact that our public schools have failed as a safety net for these vulnerable members of society. Instead of taking pains to understand and adapt to their natural behavior, they punish boys and “treat” them with drugs.

Unfortunately, they are most likely to become marginalized–society’s weaker members, preyed upon at a high cost to all concerned. Research indicates that males who have been arrested for acts of domestic violence range in age from 19 to 24 on average, had numerous discipline problems in school, and likely did not complete their secondary education. If it takes a village to raise our children and help them become productive members of society, then we must ensure all of them are included.

Our Children are the Future

Protecting our young is the duty of each and every one of us. This includes ensuring that they are educated in environments that inspire passion and where contact with violence is minimal. Right now, this is not the case. Our educational system, notably our public schools, is exposing them to a minefield of conflicts–and worse. In 2013-2014 for example, about 58 percent of public schools reported one or more incidents of a physical attack or fight without a weapon. According to the National Center for Education Statistics, this translates to approximately 453,000 incidents at a rate of about nine crimes per 1,000 students.

Against this backdrop, Drs. Stephens and the Foundation of Male Studies (FMS) has been working to create a framework that alters the current dynamic, which has disproportionately affected certain groups. They are seeking to create an environment where all young male lives, regardless of race or circumstances, matter.  More specifically, they want to ensure that, contrary to now, a third of young boys of color do not end up in detention centers and indoctrinated into the underbelly of criminal behavior.

Under the auspices of the Foundation of Male Studies (FMS) these scholars have formulated an educational approach based on years of rigorous and groundbreaking research on the state of males around the world, and which incorporates findings from seventeen hard science disciplines including biology, sociology, literature, economics, psychology and medicine. The result is the Charter Schools for the Engagement of Boys, targeting primary school-age children.

Charter School for the Engagement of Boys

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By incorporating an innovative curriculum that is relevant to, entices and inspires boys, especially those at risk, based on the United Nations Risk Factors for violence, a males well-being and lack of educational and socioeconomic attainment and the FMS scholars believe their cutting-edge teaching facility is hope for dramatically reducing the numbers of young boys–currently 6,000, most of whom are Hispanic and black–who drop out of school each day. The program is dedicated to improving opportunity for those who struggle in more traditional settings by emphasizing an instinctual masculine approach focused on reading and STEM–science, technology, engineering and mathematics.

The Science of the Male

Specifically, the new school’s foundations will rest on the “science of the male,” with a syllabus that addresses traditional male learning difficulties at all levels within a well-defined learner-learning pedagogy. It combines standard elementary school classwork with boy-specific tools, molded into a flexible and empathetic curriculum aligned to the highest standards at age-appropriate stages. The learning environment will integrate the science of male concepts in all areas of study, as follows:

  • Embrace mathematical modeling of various brain aspects using interactions and assumptions that encourage the classic recognition principal.
  • Employ techniques that manage the naturally hyperactive and restless nature of young males through processes and physical activities oriented toward discovering physical boundaries.
  • Take account of how male brains rely on unique hearing and sight cues.
  • Integrate training efforts that address underlying issues and embrace individual aggression and anger, helping to transform the conflict resolution process and improve social skills.
  • Emphasize structuring, setting and respecting boundaries.
  • Incorporate debate and discussion drills that teach students how to navigate opposing arguments that feature diametrical opinions.
  • Employ personal management programs that improve inner security and change the core beliefs of insecurity, helping to dissolve emotions such as anger and jealousy.
  • Teach and enhance problem-solving techniques.
  • Adapt and embrace masculine characteristics such as integrity, courage, creativity, innovation, adaptability and compassion.
  • Employ proven educational principles and best practices for promoting male learning.

Such efforts represent a revolutionary way of stimulating and assisting young boys to become productive and successful adults. When they no longer fall victim to societal neglect or slip through the cracks of an inadequate educational system, criminality and violence against women is likely to decline. “We plan to roll out more schools with this initiative to change the life course trajectory for boys into men and men in society,” said Dr. Edward Stephen, the founder of FMS.

FMS Involvement

Concerned individuals and organizations such as The California Endowment Health Foundation, are very interested in raising their children in the right ways and making decisions and investments that are in their interest. They also understand that to impact the cycle of violence against women that they must ensure that all young people have the opportunity to have a satisfying and productive role in society. By helping FMS in its mission to bring innovative charter school programs to those who need it most, communities can improve everyone’s quality of life.

To support a well overdue change in the current narrative for little boys and to help empower them in their lives, consider joining with the many companies, institutions, donors, alumni and ordinary individuals in every community who are already doing their part. Partner with FMS as a donor or sponsor, or lend a hand in some other way. Contact FMS online and offer active encouragement. The time to act is now.

Contact the FMS:

Dr. Edward Stephen’s

 http://www.malestudies.org/  Donate: http://www.malestudies.org/donate.html

About the Author

Tim Patten has published the handy investment guide: MGTOW, Building Wealth and Power. He also wrote WHY I CHEAT11 campfire stories for men’s ears only. Both books are a celebration of masculinity and pay homage to the modern men’s liberation movement. Patten previously published a novel about establishing gender equality in professional sports, Roller Babes: 1950s Women of Roller Derby.

 

 

 

Masculinity Deconstructed

A recent episode of HBO’s Real Time with Bill Maher featured an interview with Rebecca Traister, feminist and author of All the Single Ladies, who sang praises for the book’s themes of the rise of independent women and gender equality. Among other things, she noted that more than 50 million unmarried women are now working, escaping male oppression. That total has been rising fast, with females now representing about half of the U.S. labor force. Indeed, the progress seen so far has inspired the National Organization for Women (NOW) to lessen its emphasis on workplace equality and focus instead on helping females to “appreciate their bodies.”

One fact that Ms. Traister failed to mention, however, was that this evolving landscape has also liberated us men from the deeply ingrained and longstanding belief that women should have unfettered access to our wallets, resources, capabilities and vitality. While she and others with a narrow minded lens focus almost exclusively on how women are benefitting from gender equality, we men have been liberated, empowered and enabled to express our masculinity more freely and become unshackled from traditional marital penitentiaries and financial oppression.

Masculinity Unchained

For the first time in our history, perhaps, a large and growing number of us men can pull our shoulders back, thrust chests out, stand tall and inhale deep, satisfying breaths of fresh air. We are free from the never-ending harangues imploring us to “Be a man!” “Get a better job!” “Grow up!” and “Man up!” Seemingly overnight, masculinity has been deconstructed from the patriarchal ideal that men have one role, and nothing else. We are no longer just protectors and providers. We can transgress arbitrary constraints and pursue unconstrained endeavors, such as being our genuine selves.

In sum, men can finally move beyond archaic and outdated notions that our role in society is to endure years of hard labor to support and ensure the survival of others. We no longer need to adhere to the socially-constructed stereotype of masculinity; we are free to define it for ourselves and celebrate it in any way we choose. “Being a man” no longer means we must act in uncomfortable or unfamiliar ways or engage in behavior that is at odds with the essence of our gender identity. It means we can be what we want or were meant to be.

Prophecies of Japan’s Herbivore Men and MGTOW

Over 50 million of us who are single have the option of reclaiming our virility, which has been subsumed by a long history of matriarchal oppression and the claustrophobic bondage of familial burdens. Fortunately, the path forward has already been illuminated by the social prophets of Japan’s Herbivore Men and the global movement, Men Going their Own Way (MGTOW), who long ago prophesized immense changes in the relationship between the sexes. Their prescience has helped forge a new masculinity and given rise to myriad choices for men in regard to their sexual relationships.

In the modern, post-patriarchal age, men are no longer obligated to be the family wage earner; we can be free of a life of labor that is not of our own choosing. We no longer have to put others’ needs ahead of all else, where we must work long and grueling hours with little opportunity to spend time with those, such as our children, who we are supporting. Manhood is now being defined as we see it, not as others do. Our manly dreams, aspirations and personal goals no longer come last. With both sexes having equal opportunity, acquiescence to an obsolete social framework is no longer men’s only option.

Houses of Detention

I rued the day my male friends decided to wed. After they married, things changed almost immediately. Suddenly, they had no time for the passionate pursuits, entertainment and hobbies they had enjoyed with others and me when they were single. They were pushed into household-ish activities like shopping with the wife. Before long, the spouse would control every moment of his day, occupying his time and attention with doing and fixing things for her, their family and their home. Over time, marriage sucked the life and soul out of my male friends.

In fact, legally tying the knot has often walled men into a kind of prison, where wives are the wardens who supervise all relationships, appointments, activities, gatherings and goings-on. In the past, men have, more often than not, grudgingly gone along–humbled, contained, subdued and restricted by the domestic goddess. Over time, this fostered widespread emasculation, leaving many males embarrassed and sometimes even relishing a wife-escape to the endless hours of drudgery at work they were forced to endure.

Sadly, even these efforts have been deemed not enough. Many wives have lofty and usually costly expectations about what they want or need. They press husbands to work harder, by putting in extra time or getting a second or third job, to ensure they can satisfy their biological destiny of being a mother. If men complain about their treatment or the unfairness of it all, they are punished by a lifetime of bickering and drama. “Happy wife, happy life” has become their motto of survival.

Freedom of Choice

Thankfully, feminism’s goal of gender equality has accelerated a long-overdue revolution that they probably did not anticipate. We men now have the option of jettisoning nightmarish and one-sided relationships in favor of meaningful, self-actualized lives of self-determination and happiness. We can choose to be single, with or without children. If we decide to start a family with someone we love, we can first ascertain that partners are willing and able to pay their fair share. If we marry, we can ensure that prenuptial agreements are in place, protecting what we have if or when she decides to call it quits.

We can finally free ourselves of the shackles of marital suppression, ending the backbreaking burden of being responsible for others until the day we die from overwork or exhaustion. It is now up to us whether we choose to be in a relationship or the single life, which in its modern incarnation has become quite amazing. We are reengineering masculinity in our own image and for ourselves. Women can no longer objectify us and seek to capitalize on our status, career, and financial or other resources.

Closing the Pay Gap

Gloria Steinman once said, “We believe that men and women should have equal rights.” The radical lesbian feminist leaders of the late-1970s women’s movement, in declaring a war on men, stated, “Women want everything that men have.” Nowadays, females do, in fact, have access to a broad and diverse range of jobs and vocations, with little holding them back. If they keep pushing themselves to the limit–as they have long pressured us to do–they can achieve a level of independence that they might once have only imagined.

By the same token, the advances they have made–and will likely continue to make–mean that the bar is being raised ever higher in regards to the contributions they must make to provide for themselves and their families. Ironically, we can help them go one step further. We can use what we learned from our role as obligatory breadwinners and implore them to “Get a better paying job!” and “Woman up!” We have the expertise and awareness of what it takes; in fact, no one understands this idea better than we do.

Indeed, we can help women by pressuring them in the way they pushed us: “Suck it up! Do what men have done for millennia! Close the pay gap by choosing extremely high paying occupations.” We should stand behind their desire for equality and encourage them to take good-paying jobs as roofers, street-sweepers, power-line installers, and refuse workers. We should support their efforts to become pilots, engineers, mechanics and deep-sea fishermen (or fisherwomen). We should discourage them from working in childcare, social work, administrative and food services, and other traditionally low-paying careers.

If women are as loyal to their families as they always insisted we be, they will undoubtedly seek out and consider occupations that pay high wages but demand substantial effort and involve a great deal of risk. As they expected of us, they shouldn’t hesitate to do whatever is necessary to bring home the bacon. They should be reassured that being under pressure, feeling constantly tired and frustrated, and relegating their individual needs and wants to the background is necessary in an equal opportunity world.

By then, women will truly understand what it means to be the breadwinner.

About the Author

Tim Patten published the celebration of masculinity MGTOW, Building Wealth and Power. He also wrote WHY I CHEAT11 campfire stories for men’s ears only. Both books pay homage to the modern men’s liberation movement. Patten previously published a novel about establishing gender equality in professional sports, Roller Babes: 1950s Women of Roller Derby.

Yes, We Cry

Many Americans celebrated the June 9, 2016 report concluding that Hillary Clinton would be the first female nominee for the most powerful office on Earth. Meanwhile, the National Organization for Women, having declared satisfaction with the level of equality in America, has focused attentions on a “love your body” campaign. These and other developments would seem to indicate that the long-running and frequently hyperbolic “debate” on gender and relations between the sexes has evolved into something more thoughtful and constructive.

Unfortunately, not everyone has gotten the message. Academic feminists, for instance, continue to press for adoption of Men’s and Masculinity Studies programs on college campuses. This curriculum maintains, among other things, that a social framework where boys are told, “Don’t cry, son,” as well as overexposure to hyper-masculinized representations of heroic stoicism, has caused males to suppress their emotions, leaving most of us expressively “underdeveloped.” As a result, we are often confronted by frustrated women who ask, “Can’t you just share your feelings?” Others take a more assertive tack–“Show some emotion!” they say. If we don’t cry, it means there is something wrong with us.

Are Men Dispassionate?

My first pet, Princess, was a beagle who taught me a lot about love and loyalty. When I was eight-years old, she went mad, as some dogs do, and bit my best friend, Tommy Mitchell. Consequently, the first love of my life had to be put down. At dusk on a rainy day, my dad led me into the Wisconsin woods, where he did the deed with a .22-caliber pistol. A shot rang out against the dampened tree limbs. Princess’s head slumped back and she collapsed. Suddenly, she lay very still. I looked away, stunned. I sniffled, and then cried deeply.

“Boys don’t cry. It’s a dog,” my father muttered.

I sat in the car while Dad buried Princess. I cried and hugged myself tightly, trying to will things back to the way they were only a day before. I went home and watched a movie, featuring rugged John Wayne, on TV.

 

I have never forgotten that evening when Princess left us. But there have also been other moments and experiences through the years, some good and some bad, that have remained with me, even as I enjoy my retirement from the work force. I have been passionate and emotional about many things throughout my life, but I’m sure the same could be said about others. Contrary to what we men are told, almost all of us have cried and experienced deep and powerful feelings.

Underneath Our Sleeves

And yet, many believe otherwise, largely because we do not wear our emotions on our sleeves. No small number of us prefer to cry in private or, perhaps out of embarrassment, we shed tears more quietly than women do. Societal expectations have likely played a role, but so, too, has our past. Researchers who have evaluated the differences from an evolutionary perspective have concluded that our ancient male ancestors needed to suppress sentiment when they were protecting the village, killing enemies, or hunting for food; over time it was natural for us to keep doing so. As designated protectors, we often mute expressiveness in an effort to better assess circumstances in case we need to leap into action.

Many females, in contrast, are sensitive and quick to show their feelings, imploring us to comfort them and assuage their anxieties in return. We are expected to attend to their emotional needs and grievances, many of which seem endless. Such a dynamic makes it difficult for female partners who might naturally assume the same holds true when things are reversed. But that is not the case: men and women are different and deal with emotions and circumstances in differing ways. Our reactions are typically not like theirs; in many cases, we do not seek their emotional support.

In fact, when we experience fear, it often stirs up empathy so deep that we feel compelled to run to the rescue and save lives. This heroic response seems to come naturally, an instinct at least some of us are born with. Most people, male or female, would probably jump out of their skin if confronted by someone in immediate and grave danger. But men often become extraordinary heroes at such moments. In the aftermath of a house fire or similar tragedy, it is not all that odd to hear a man say, “I saw women stand around crying in hysterics while valuable minutes were slipping away. Another guy and I ran in and did what we had to help those who were in trouble.”

Flawed, or Simply Different?

In family and more relaxed settings, it’s not difficult to see men and women communicating and emoting at different levels, vibrations and methods. In fact, it has become something of a cliché: men complain that their spouses talk too much, while women complain that their husbands only grunt. But this does not necessarily indicate a failing: more often than not, it stems from physiological differences. Scientists who have studied brain function have determined, for example, that nerve signals can follow alternate neuropathways in men and women. By analyzing brain scans, researchers have concluded that the two sexes process feelings by way of different behaviors and patterns, and at dissimilar times and circumstances.

Even then, associating the divergence with obvious physical differences may not tell the whole story. There are those who believe that transsexual and gender-fluid individuals can have much in common with individuals of the opposite sex, or the gender of those they closely identify with. Regardless, an assessment of the binary male brain points to a results-oriented focus, geared towards action and problem-solving. We seek to crack puzzles, ponder universal meanings and explore new horizons. When faced with danger, our minds move into overdrive in a quest for answers and actions to take.

The female brain, in contrast, seems to work in a more process-oriented way. Most are quick to connect, sharing emotions and explaining behavior, delving into various illuminations after networking with others. Girls and women favor social interaction and arrangements where people can come together, either in person or indirectly by telephone, text or email, to communicate and address whatever issues may be at hand. To solve problems, they will often seek to assemble task forces to share ideas, see how others feel, and reach a consensus that takes a great many perspectives into account.

Arguably, the differences between the two sexes can be summed up by an old joke: “When a couple are in a foreign city and get lost, the man looks at the map, while the woman askes someone for directions.”

More than Physiology

Still, while an understanding of gender-based factors is helpful in grasping the differences, physiology isn’t the only factor that influences the way women and men see, evaluate and connect with the world. Career choices, job requirements and other pressures can also influence how individual minds and emotional mechanisms work. Needless to say, understanding this fact can provide useful clues about how best to communicate and work with someone we may care about deeply.

Among those whose careers require them to process emotional imagery and interact with others on a regular basis are health care workers, teachers, social workers, therapists and counselors. In contrast, those who fall into the problem-solving camp, which can include both men and women who are task-oriented and focused on results and solutions, are manual laborers, electricians, technical workers, engineers and those in jobs that involve high physical risk.

Sometimes, Words Say it All

Whether or not an individual fits with the above, there are other ways of assessing where they might fall on the process-action-oriented scale. Simple as it sounds, this includes listening to what they say and how they describe the everyday realities of home, work and life, as illustrated in the table of examples below:

PROCESS-ORIENTED

I saw your mother and she didn’t say “hi”?

How are you feeling?

Do you still love me?

Did you do that to intentionally hurt me?

I saw Carol and Dave today.

Why didn’t you call me back?

How was your day?

I love you more every day.

RESULTS/ACTION-ORIENTED

Did you make any progress at work today?

Are the deadlines close?

Did you solve anything today?

I’m trying to repair my credit–any ideas?

What are you trying to work out?

Is it more complicated than you expected?

After finishing the project, let’s party.

Did you hear we found water on Mars?

Conclusion

The fact that individuals may fall into one camp or another, whether driven by physiology or other factors, means we must not bow down to broad-brush stereotypes, promoted largely by feminist advocates of women’s, gender and masculinities studies curricula, that men, masculinity and gender are social constructs. Such programs are mere propaganda, designed to promote a political agenda and nothing more. Rather than accepting their unscientific assertions that men need to be changed, we should be working to improve how all of us–men and women–exchange ideas and communicate with one another.

For those of us who find themselves in relationships and settings were others don’t respect and understand our differences, and can’t stop labeling men as having stunted emotional maturity, the answer is simple: separate ourselves from these toxic individuals. Instead, choose an extraordinary escape hatch from women’s and society’s misunderstandings–the men of MGTOW. Once you reach out and communicate with our genuine masculine souls, you’ll find friends forever.

 

There is no doubt that men are resourceful and embody the profound passions that have helped to build the greatest civilization on Earth. In the exciting world that we see ahead, things can only get better.

About the Author

 

Tim Patten published his own search for identity in a hysterical and moving autobiography: My Razzle Dazzle under his pen name Todd Peterson. Tim also released in 2016: MGTOW, Building Wealth and Power and WHY I CHEAT11 campfire stories for men’s ears only. Both books are a celebration of masculinity and pay homage to the modern men’s liberation movement. Patten previously published the novel about establishing gender equality in professional sports, Roller Babes: 1950s Women of Roller Derby.

 

Patriarchy and Lesbian Feminist Scholars

Lesbian feminist author Maria Mies once wrote, “If patriarchy had a specific beginning in history, it can certainly have an end.” As with other feminist scholars, a group dominated by mostly white lesbians who share a perversely narrow-minded perspective, Mies is convinced that patriarchy–as well as the male sex–is oppressive and malevolent to women. Ostensibly, they advocate for female equality, but their lengthy lectures say otherwise. Their words detail a horrendously aggressive fraternity of privileged white men who pay women pennies on the dollar as they socially and institutionally oppress, dominate, discriminate against, and abuse them.

In fact, the feminists’ words and actions have little to do with righting a wrong, but are instead founded on a theoretical framework, crafted by a lesbian elite, that maintains males are disgusting and immoral by nature. These experts promote no remedies other than the destruction of patriarchy. In some ways, they are like society’s scolding mothers, warning little boys that masturbating will make them blind. They project a worldview based on a myopically gendered lens that has been characterized as a hate crime by Canada’s Studio Brule and a social disease by Milo Yiannoulos. At their most extreme, their theories have morphed into cancers of annihilation, marked by such derisive memes as StopPatriarchy, KillAllWhiteMen, AllMenAreRapists and KillAllMen.

History of Patriarchy

Patriarchy first appeared in Africa about 200,000 years ago, inspired by a natural order of human needs and talents. In virtually all known histories of our ancient ancestors, the role of the male was that of provider and protector; his strength and daring were deemed critical to the survival of the tribe. The best of the lot were (and are) referred to as “alpha males,” idolized for their contributions. There’s little doubt that the rise of the alpha male was inevitable and necessary, enabling mankind to blaze a trail through dangerous and unfamiliar terrain. (That does not mean they were the only ones. Lesbians or gender-fluid tribe members might also have been hunter-gatherers alongside them. )

Over time, the alpha males became the secular and spiritual leaders, kings, pharaohs and emperors, expanding their wealth, influence and power over others. They launched and drove unrelenting efforts to build great monuments, palaces and religious shrines; some spent the whole of their lives creating the many wonders of the world. From the great Pyramids of Egypt, to the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, to the Statue of Zeus in Greece–the lowliest toiled and slaved for these leaders in their efforts to leave enduring marks on the world.

And yet, while many undoubtedly suffered under the oppressive will of these powerful individuals, it is apparent across all civilizations that patriarchy helped to harness and improve a harsh and often violent world, spurring the development and implementation of innovative technologies and breathtaking infrastructure, including electricity and lighting networks, water supply and sewage treatment facilities, railroads, highways, bridges and other features of modern transportation systems, and the construction of homes, schools, hospitals and other structures. A male-dominated social order was responsible for any number of developments, including the Internet, which have benefited countless individuals of varying means. In many respects, patriarchy is everything, and there is little else.

Women in Patriarchy

That said, not all of history’s movers and shakers have been male. There have been queens and wives with substantial privilege and power. Eleanor of Aquitaine, born in 1122, was one of the wealthiest and most powerful women in Europe and the world during the High Middle Ages. Egyptian leader Hatshepsut, who lived from 1508 BC to 1458 BC, has been regarded as one of the most influential females in the ancient world. Empress Wu Zetian, who was born in 625 AD and lived for 80 years during the Tang Dynasty, is considered to be the most dominant in Chinese history. There was even a queen of Spain who commanded men to risk their lives sailing three ships into a dangerous unknown in a search for spices; they accidentally discovered the Americas.

While the gender imbalance has not been wholly addressed, it is apparent that our world has a richer and far more diverse social fabric than feminist scholars acknowledge. These self-appointed arbiters of society’s alleged failings have defined a naïve model of what the problem is and how it can be fixed. This, in turn, has promulgated propaganda that frightens and disturbs people, especially students, with offensive distinctions and discriminatory labels. While some feminists might have good intentions, all are guilty of using broad strokes and detestable stereotypes in regard to males. Equality aside, there must be a reason for this defilement, other than hatred.

Lesbian Culture

We often hear gender studies professors declare that gender, femininity and masculinity are social constructs, though oddly enough, many will also argue that gay and lesbian people are born that way. In truth, social structures in the gay community of San Francisco–where, one might say, birds of a feather flock together–indicate that gender preferences and perspectives, even in the “gay mecca,” naturally diverge. On any given night, one might see men wearing David Bowie, four-inch, come-fuck-me platform shoes, poised to dance the night away at high-tech nightclubs. In contrast, one might find women who have sequestered themselves inside murky sports bars, discussing such topics as sliding-scale entry fees for the poor and marginalized.

Certainly, some lesbians dislike, even hate men. The ladies at a gay bar can often be heard sharing envious jabs emasculating privileged white males, while the Alix Dobkin song, A Woman’s Love, echoes from rickety speakers amid clacking pool balls. Lesbian bars, in contrast to gay-oriented counterparts, are often located in dank and dangerous parts of town. Inside, it is not uncommon to see heavy-set bullies, terrifying to the eye, interacting with boys who look like hooligan girls, while lipstick-lesbians at the bar swear like sailors, waiting, it seems, for the “right” individual. Some patrons are defensive and aggressive; most are manlier than the real thing. The atmosphere reeks of toxic masculinity, feline jealousy and, sadly, lesbian-on-lesbian sexual assault.

If a man happens to walk through the door, he will invariably be faced with behavior that leaves him cringing and with the urge to back off and head in the other direction. In many ways, lesbian culture seems to be a parody of college-level feminist courses, but without the textbooks, note taking and tuition fees. In this self-designed utopia, these individuals have created a female-only social hierarchy–a paradise without patriarchy. Evidently, they want society, more broadly speaking, to be the same.

The Lesbian War on Men

Advocates of this alternative reality have found another great watering hole in college-level humanities departments. Their influence has been growing since the 1960s, when lesbians came out in droves as the women’s and gay rights movements gained pace. An example of how such thinking has distorted our worldview can be seen in a 1970s BBC documentary, Angry Wimmin. In the film, which explores the origins of the women’s movement, angry lesbians describe patriarchy as “a war on men.” They denigrate male sexuality and spout forth on theories that feminist scholars use to prove that all men are violent, oppressive and potential rapists.

“Angry Wimmin” – A BBC documentary on Lesbian Feminism

Through endless repetition, as well as the unthinking acquiescence and misguided support of the media and the political hierarchy, this view has become the basis for seemingly acceptable slurs that denigrate men as evil and dangerous–which, needless to say, are having a harmful influence on those individuals, especially the young and impressionable, who hear such messages. Unfortunately, such distorted notions are not helping to make society more equal or just. Rather, they are spawning an endless cycle of disgust and distrust that is having a debilitating and far-reaching effect, especially on young boys.

Our Modern Patriarchy

As noted earlier, patriarchy is widespread, impossible–and unnecessary–to dismantle. That said, it is becoming increasingly inclusive, with females such as France’s Liliane Bettencourt, the richest woman in the world, and Alice Walton, the second richest with $32.3 billion to her name, near the top of the pyramid. In fact, reports suggest that 10% of the world’s most powerful people are women, while 1% are people of color. Diverse and ever changing, this social framework is protecting women and providing financial and other benefits to many of those who been disenfranchised.

Unfortunately, the lesbian scholars who exert such a powerful influence on college-level humanities, women’s and gender studies programs, and whose careers have been built on warped theories, disagree. But their influence is diminishing. Rational and clear-thinking people are recognizing that all genders, races and nationalities must surmount any number of obstacles to become socially mobile and financially buoyant.

As a result, they are seeing the feminist mantra for what it is: fringe-nutcase conspiracy theories that rely on hyperbolic narrow-mindedness to justify a collective aversion toward men. The pseudo-scholars have built a rickety latticework on propaganda and half-truths. They have spent considerable time slaying invisible dragons and poisoning minds. Instead of helping people to become more productive and happy, they have inspired anger and anarchy.

Conclusion

Even so, there is no reason to try to rid the world of these lost souls or disrupt their livelihoods. If they choose to escape from what they imagine patriarchy to be by congregating in closed (and closed-minded) communities, socializing in lesbian bars, and proselyting in the women’s and gender studies departments of institutions of higher learning across the country, so be it. They have made their choices freely, and they have the same right as any of us has to live lives and embark on careers that we believe are best for us.

But that does not mean we should do nothing. We should try to benefit from their mistakes. We should take pains to understand their gendered lens and choose to inclusively move forward, ignoring the false credo of male domination. We must also come to terms with the secret of happiness: accepting what is. For all its faults, patriarchy has, since time immemorial, helped to solve a great many of mankind’s problems and protected us from harm. We should modify and enhance it for the benefit of all.  By embracing how things actually work, we can build our own power, wealth and freedom, and can draw others toward us that we can love and appreciate.

***

About the Author

Tim Patten published his own search for identity in a hysterical and moving autobiography: My Razzle Dazzle under his pen name Todd Peterson. Tim also released in 2016: MGTOW, Building Wealth and Power and WHY I CHEAT11 campfire stories for men’s ears only. Both books are a celebration of masculinity and pay homage to the modern men’s liberation movement. Patten previously published the novel about establishing gender equality in professional sports, Roller Babes: 1950s Women of Roller Derby.

College Women’s and Gender Studies Brainwahsing

The critical gendered lens

When freshmen sign up for a college-level humanities course oriented toward feminism, women’s or gender studies, they are urged to examine relationships between heterosexual and homosexual individuals through a “critical gendered lens.”[i] These classes, typically filled with women, LGBTQ individuals and a few heterosexual men, are predicated on an examination of gender identification and how identity intersects within other social collectives of power and privilege.

From the outset, attendees are immersed in discussions about the dark side of gendered violence, which is defined as intimidation; emotional, verbal and physical abuse; sexual assault; rape; and the murder of women. Approved textbooks “confirm” the pervasiveness of this far-reaching problem, characterizing it as fact. Gender and Communications maintains, for example, that up to 70% of women will suffer from “systematic gendered violence. [ii][iii]

Faced with this manipulative barrage, it isn’t long before the critical gendered lens of those taking the course is pointed in the desired direction: Women and queer people are socially marginalized and victims of white male power and violence.

Instilling Anarchy 

To understand how this perspective is reinforced, it is helpful to visualize the mind’s eye peering through a telescope, like those used by NASA scientists, to examine the vast universe of human interactions. When feminist intellectuals developed the notion of a filtered perspective, they determined that a socially marginalized lens was the preferred option, rather than, say, one defined by the most powerful women in history, the prominent lesbian and gay men of history, or women who broke gender barriers in professional sports.

Once the critical gendered lens is in place, students are urged to think about their own experiences of being bullied, whether for being different, small or female. They are also encouraged to recall moments when they might have been abused, molested, scolded and disciplined by men. Over time, the association between their personal experiences and gendered inequality becomes ingrained, and many can’t help but feel that systematic oppression is real, leaving some with anarchic leanings.

Instilling Hate for Men

Over time, various subjects, including heteropatriarchy−oppressive male heterosexual dominance−the pay gap, white male privilege, neoliberal capitalism, rape culture, and toxic masculinity, are presented to the class. Although the discussions generally include a range of perspectives, the primary focus is on female and LBGTQ oppression. Not surprisingly, the plight of those who have been “disadvantaged” tugs at the students’ heartstrings, reinforcing the manipulated biases of their young minds. It also spurs a desire among many of them to seek social justice through disorder and activism.

Social Justice Warriors

After 4 to 8 years of immersion in oppression, leaves students uneducated on a real society. Most students cannot get a reasonable job. This appears to be abuse.

 

[iii] http://www.amazon.com/Womens-Voices-Feminist-Visions-Contemporary/dp/007351232X/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1462230154&sr=8-3&keywords=women%27s+voices

 

[iv] http://www.nytimes.com/2015/09/22/us/a-third-of-college-women-experience-unwanted-sexual-contact-study-finds.html?_r=0

 

Emotionally Underdeveloped Husband

( published at The Good Men Project and A Voice For Men )

Society has decided that males are terrible communicators who are not in touch with their emotions. In fact, psychologists often maintain that emotions frighten men and many don’t know what or how they are feeling.[i] The perception that males are emotionally “stunted” often leads females to be upset with them or to pressure them to be more open about what is on their mind. “He just won’t talk,” frustrated wives complain,[ii] while others take a more assertive tack— “Share yourself!” they say. If he doesn’t come around, it means there is something wrong with him.[iii]

Experts point to the fact that little boys are discouraged from crying or opening up about their feelings as some sort of proof that men are toxic, emotionless and without passion. This theme is pervasive in the media and in the arts, at colleges and in other educational settings, and in the discussions and interactions that punctuate daily life, but men have been wrongly stereotyped. The fact is that men and women both have feelings, but they exhibit and express them in different ways.

Men are not dispassionate and unloving; they love deeply and enjoy the tingling textures of the world around them. Internal emotions inform and navigate their behavioral decisions, choices and mental judgments. Like women, they experience relationship pain, joy and everyday thrills, and are able to connect with other people on many levels. However, men do not process certain aspects and interactions, including intimate relationships, in the same way as women do. This largely reflects social conditions and a framework embedded in 400,000 years of human DNA.[iv]

And yet, women can’t help but complain about it. They want their male partners to emote or, perhaps, to cry more. Since many of them express their feelings in this way, they believe men should do so, too. But there is something fundamentally wrong with such assertions. Males are being evaluated based on a female-oriented sensitivity meter, which means the yardstick for emotional responsiveness is inherently biased. Because men are deemed inadequate according to this standard, they are assumed to be seriously lacking.

But this is not fair or accurate. Men and women are not equal. There are a wide range of social and physiological differences between them. That doesn’t only mean the obvious differences between males and females; research has shown that the brains of each sex are hard-wired in contrary neuro pathways. In other words, men and women process emotions by way of different behaviors, patterns, at different times and circumstances.[v] They also communicate emotions differently.[vi]

A Common Complaint about Husbands

It is not uncommon to hear a stay-at-home wife or mother complain about a husband who comes home from a long day at work, heaves a sigh of relief, flops his ass down, and zones out in front of a computer screen.[vii] Invariably, female insecurities bubble to the surface. She is disgusted by his escape into video games.[viii] Her inferiority complex kicks into high gear. She wonders if he has fallen out of love and begins to question their relationship. Because they—or she—expected marriage would make things better, they end up arguing—on average, seven times every day.[ix][x]

Why some men escape to the computer. Since the beginning of time, men have been conditioned to avoid causing emotional distress to women and to protect their feelings. At the same time, females have groomed males to lie whenever necessary. Regardless of how he might feel, a man must tell his woman that she is beautiful, pretty and skinny, and that he loves her unconditionally. He must tell her lies each and every day, or else she will experience severe emotional pain.

If a man speaks the truth— “Life has exhausted me.” “I hate my boss and job.” “The pressure is too much.” “I wish I could quit, but we need the paycheck.” “Your bickering is damaging me further.”—he understands that it will cause her serious emotional harm, leading to escalating arguments and the perception that she is unloved. If that happens, he knows the rest of his life will be hell. It is better to suppress what could be seen as an emotional assault on the woman he loves.

Wives Complain about Husbands

Although times have changed, many couples continue to see their relationship in traditional terms. For her part, a stay-at-home wife or mother will focus on maintaining the family’s accommodations. She decorates and structures the living space to ensure no harm comes to the children. She also implements rules and regulations that tightly control the nest and all of those inside. Under the circumstances, if hubby comes home from work, reaches for a beer, sits in front of the TV and clams up, instead of doing what she asks, it isn’t long before they enter the relationship battle zone.

Why some men escape with beer and TV. Profit-making enterprises invariably harness and monitor an employee’s efforts and abilities by way of rules and the overarching threat that those who don’t go along will not be employed long. Unless a man works for the government or a university, he is usually overseen and pressured by an owner, manager or director. Once at home, he needs time to breathe and allow the pressures from work to seep into the cosmic ether. He needs escape.

What often happens, however, is that when he walks through the door, he is confronted by the expectations of the boss of the domestic empire. After succumbing to the demands of overseers at his job, he is pressured into taking on the duties and obligations imposed by his wife. To many men, this is simply more work. If a man is burdened on the job and at home, he will often escape through alcohol and other substance use.

Without freedom, men become hampered and suppress their genuine selves. Many cherish liberty and independence; once they leave work, they must refresh their souls with a drink of the tasty sovereignty juice. They savor it and let it quench their thirst, replenishing natural virtues. Not all men escape in the same way, of course. Some seek solace through fishing and hunting, reminding them of their place on our planet.

Academia’s Attacks on Men

The pressures men face don’t just come from home and work. Authors of women’s and gender studies textbooks, for example, spend a tremendous amount of time blaming males for all sorts of problems. In Chapter 12, “How Men Silence Women in Marital Relationships,”[xi] of Language and Gender,[xii] which examines the differences in communication between the sexes, Victoria Leto DeFrancisco details a social experiment that “proved” husbands dominate wives through everyday conversations. Her research involved placing recorders inside married couples’ homes and later analyzing what they said. Below is one such conversation, between “Clair” and “Bob”:

Clair:   I went to Safeway food market today.

Bob:    Ah-ha.

Clair:   I ran into your mother.

Bob:    Ran into who?

Clair:   Your mother—she didn’t recognize me or know who I was.

Bob:    Ahhh.

Clair:   She was at the meat counter and I looked right at her.

Bob:    I’ll be right back, I need a cigarette.

Clair:   (When Bob returns.) So I followed her up an aisle. She never looked back.

Bob:    Well, my mom has tunnel vision.

Clair:   And I talked to Duane today, for my dental appointment.

Bob:    Let me go feed the dogs.

According to Dr. DeFrancisco, the wives she studied felt patronized and “put down,” and believed their husbands were “fake listening.” Her conclusion was that women try to talk but that men stubbornly dominate them with patronizing behavior and by ignoring what they say.

An alternative explanation for what happened between Clair and Bob. Family and social drama disturbs many men, but seems to turn on no small number of women. Regardless, in the conversation detailed above, it is just as likely that something else was going on. Perhaps Bob didn’t enjoy discussing the fragile relationship between his mother and his wife. He knows there is friction and that there is no remedy to this particular situation. Since a man’s brain is hardwired to solve problems, he sees no point in confronting his mother. Over time, Bob has become extremely sensitive to his wife’s emotional issues with his mother and is tired of arguing about it.

In reality, it is unfair for Clair to expect Bob to straighten out his mother’s problems or to put up with endless family relationship drama. Unfortunately, while the latter can easily disgust many men, they can’t simply tell their wives to “shut up!” If they do, they will likely end up spending a week sleeping on the couch. In the end, they decide to keep quiet about the all-to-common drama involving a wife and other members of the extended families. Such struggles might be interesting fodder for television, but they can also lead men to snap.

Like many other women’s studies authors, Dr. DeFrancisco has cast unfair aspersions on all males. These academics appear wholly ignorant of the biological differences between the sexes and the workings of the brain.

Conclusion

For the most part, wives, therapists and academics continue to have a serious misunderstanding about men, masculinity and the emotional male. Like the women at a coffee klatch who keep telling old wives tails about defective hubby failures, there are plenty of people who still don’t get how men communicate and operate. Little boys do cry and men are emotionally sensitive. When a man falls in love, the feeling is so overwhelming that he is often imbued with the urge to care for his lover forever. Men shouldn’t be faulted because they aren’t like women. Ignorant and damaging stereotypes should be disregarded, and men should be appreciated for who they really are.

Throughout history, men have willingly sacrificed their own lives for others, demonstrating deep loyalty, affection and respect for their fellow humans—male or female. Men have built our civilizations and have passionately reached for the stars. Some men set their aspirations on mastering unsurmountable obstacles, seeking cures, and innovations that benefit all humankind. Others choose an alternative course. Regardless, for those who are seeking freedom from the entanglements of destructive relationships, there is an option worth considering: Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW). Around the world, men are finding mentorship into a new lifestyle of single-man happiness that is financially and emotionally nourishing and amazing.

About the Author

Tim Patten has recently published MGTOW, Building Wealth and Power. He also wrote WHY I CHEAT  11 campfire stories for men’s ears only. Both books are a celebration of masculinity and pay homage to the modern men’s liberation movement. Patten previously published a novel about establishing gender equality in professional sports, Roller Babes: 1950s Women of Roller Derby.

[i] https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/emotional-fitness/201008/men-women-emotions-and-communication

 

[ii] http://www.uncommon-knowledge.co.uk/psychology_articles/men-women-emotions.html

 

[iii] http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/11/15/tf.emotional.men/

 

[iv] http://www.ibtimes.com/oldest-human-dna-400000-years-old-why-do-scientists-call-discovery-irritating-1495796

 

[v] http://www.fitbrains.com/blog/women-men-brains/

 

[vi] https://www.natcom.org/CommCurrentsArticle.aspx?id=749

 

[vii] http://couplestherapyinc.com/emotional-distance-in-marriage/

 

[viii] https://realtruth.org/articles/346-vgaefr.html

 

[ix] http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1389002/Fallout-Couples-argue-average-seven-times-day.html

 

[x] http://www.womenofspirit.com/?id=147

 

[xi] http://das.sagepub.com/content/2/4/413.abstract

 

[xii] http://www.amazon.com/Language-Gender-Reader-Jennifer-Coates/dp/1405191279/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1461271206&sr=8-3&keywords=language+and+gender